I am not really sure, why I writing today, Valentines Day. I guess I had some thoughts I would like to share, about why I am feeling, "less appreciated", than I think I deserve?
I got flowers for Valentines Day, and that is a lovely gift. If the flowers weren't roses, the, "traditional", gesture you give to someone you love on the day you are suppose to give them, I wouldn't be bothered? It was almost as if, it was an obligation?? Of course this "stems" from years of frustration, because, I was supposed to be the, "bread winner", the cooperate mother that won "paid for trips", and could buy the extra things, we were custom to? I gave that up, because, those things didn't make me happy!
I spend so much time, "trying to do the right thing", making up the loss of that income. I am not sure, it will ever be enough?
Little by little and day to day, I make a difference helping kids by coaching them and being a mentor. I know, my own kids will be better for having my attention and me being there for them. When money becomes a factor, it messes everything up. I feel like I am obligated and can't do what my heart tells me is the right thing, to do. I have so much to offer, but, my lack of "education" keeps me from being "compensated" for, what I love doing?
I am a really hard worker and whatever I put my heart and sole into, I give 110% of myself. I think that is why, when my whole entire team; nominated me, as "Coach of the Year", it was the most humbling moment in my life. I think, it was the nicest thing, anyone has ever done for me. For a night, the night of those awards, I was so blessed and felt so honored, because, I was appreciated for what I love to do.
Now, as I write, I am starting to see a lot of, I this and I that? This is not my intention, in anyway. I am not a self promoting person, looking to make money for what I love to do. I am using the, "social networks", to share my story, and show others they are capable of anything!
I have this insight in people, and what drives them and makes them happy. I encourage the youth, because they have embraced me, and empowerd me to feel, "worthy", to teach them to be good people, as if I am one of them. The parents of the kids I coach, have embraced my energy and love that I compliment the kids and make them all feel special and a part of something. They teach me and I teach them. I stand up for what's fair. I give them the credit they deserve and don't under estimate them. This is what has made me a successful coach and my team so amazing. We trust each other !!
In thinking about where I started and where I am today, I can clearly see, we all have a purpose. I may not be, "book smart", and I may have certain disablities that prevent me from being the norm, or getting a 9-5 job? I don't have that answers, rigtht now, why I was chosen to stuggle in those areas. What I do know, I am a good coach and mentor for all kids. I am a fighter that fixed my own septic system and taught myself how to replace a water heater. I am no different than anyone else in this world, and we all have our differences. We can either fight to be happy, or live as miserable human beings! We should compliment eachother and use eachothers strengths to grow together?
If we could just get passed the differences we all have, and give eachother, "equal opportunites", I think that would make for a "fair playing field".
I am still learning the sport of soccer, I am continuing to take coaching classes, so I can not only teach good ethics and values, but also have a clear and better understanding of the actual game. I reach out to those that can help me with that, and they are empowerd that I care to ask the questions. Never be afraid to look stupid, its ok to admit your weakness. No one knows everything, and there is always someone out there willing to tell their story and inspire someone else!
My roses, are in water and I will care for them, as they deserve to be cared for. I did however, put them in tuperware, because, even a rose has to adapt to its enviornement. We all know, that the world around us, is changing everyday; and, if we can't afford a home made out of Crystal, then we must survive in a a home made out plastic, or we wont survive at all!
xx Coach Salvo